Podcast

If you grew up in a strict religious home, you were most likely taught about heaven, hell, and a very long list of what makes us a good person or a bad person. At times, it feels as if our most intimate feelings can be judged and create feelings of guilt, confusion, and inadequacy. Whether it be Jehovah’s Witness or Judaism, people tend to hand over religion and ideas about G-d in a way that layers guilt on top of obligation. As humans we are bound to make mistakes, sometimes we do, say or feel things that we are not proud of. When you are brought up in a authoritarian religion or faith community and/or your parents or [...]

Nothing good comes from self-shaming. When relapse happens, it can be easy to fall into a shame cycle of self-loathing. When we promised ourselves we’d “quit for good,” or “never fall back into old patterns,” and find ourselves back there, it can be overwhelming. We may find ourselves scouring our memory to understand how we could have gotten back here. Or, maybe we’re stuck in a cycle of dealing with unresolved trauma – feeling waves of shame and guilt that are all consuming. In today’s SHAIR Recovery Coaching call, the group helped Pete. Currently in a state of relapse, Pete struggles to confront his relapse behavior until the [...]

After the loss of her Father, Brother, and Aunt, and a failed business, Lori Windfeldlt found her first sip of alcohol, “glorious.” As a stay at home mother, her habit continued to escalate until she had the realization that she lost her identity in a bottle of wine. Upon reaching her rock bottom moment, she found herself in a state of surrender asking for help.  Lori entered into a treatment facility and quickly learned that she also suffered from other co-occurring disorders including anxiety, depression, and unresolved trauma. Upon getting sober and learning more about herself, Lori discovered that sobriety and recovery were extremely different and there was [...]

For anyone looking to heal from past hurts, inner child work and reparenting is crucial. No matter what we do in our lives, we're trying to feel something. When we don't feel secure and confident within ourselves, we can find ourselves acting out with maladaptive behaviors caused by underlying hurts. Whether we know it or not, we spend years abusing ourselves and people around us, repeating patterns, and when we struggle with addiction can get caught in a cycle of chronic relapse. Oftentimes, it's these underlying hurts that have us wanting to be acknowledged, seen, and valued. Some of these issues can only be addressed with inner child [...]

In 2011, Don Cummins was homeless, desperate to get high, and had already served 20 years in prison for bank robberies. Not only suffering from mental health issues, addiction, and incarceration, the court had also declared him insane. Willing to do anything to escape from reality, he went to any lengths to not feel discomfort from the trauma he experienced and abuse he suffered. From the age of 10 Don started to get high, and by the age of 13 was committed to a program, never to live at home again. The rest of his teenage years were spent in youth homes, juvenile detention centers, and at the [...]

With addiction comes lies, deceit, and betrayal. However, with recovery can come the looming after effects of guilt, shame, and regret. When we get sober, we must learn to love, forgive ourselves, and make peace with our past. Acknowledging the mistakes we’ve made and moving forward is often easier said than done. Forgiving ourselves requires empathy, compassion, loving, and understanding. It also requires us to accept that forgiveness is a choice. How To Forgive Yourself In addition, many of us can hold onto our past mistakes that we feel are not forgivable. We live in fear of forgetting the hurt. Reliving and replaying these feelings over again, we [...]

Do you believe that everything happens for a reason? We’re all drawn to different things for different reasons and learning to tap into our intuition can help us find the answers to questions we’ve long asked.  One of the most common ways individuals can find the messages they need to hear is through an oracle deck. This communication vehicle between spirit and human consciousness has long provided guidance for living in alignment with the human heart, soul, and Universe to live up to your deepest desires and experiences. The oracle deck has also long been used to make decisions and point the way to personal development, joy, and [...]

There are so many elements that go into co-parenting, including charged emotions, high anxiety, and dysfunctional dynamics - which is maybe why you got divorced in the first place. Though, what about co-parenting when one person is in recovery and the other person is still in active addiction? When your children are away and you fear that your ex-husband or ex-wife are going to put your children’s lives in danger, how do you navigate what you can’t control? Co-Parenting Challenges in Sobriety In today’s SHAIR Recovery Coaching call, we helped Brandi. Filled with fear, anxiety, and frustration that her ex-husband is putting her children’s life in danger with [...]

“When I was around my friends, they gave me all the love I wasn’t getting elsewhere. I had a deep fear of rejection and judgment.” At the age of 20, Traci Butz claims she was addicted to fun. Fulfilling her need for socialization, love, and connection that spearheaded the relief from childhood wounds, she felt less of a need for education and structure. At the age of 27, her partying led her to marrying a person in active addiction. Finding Your Purpose After years of crossed boundaries, manipulation, and a toxic codependent relationship, the hope Traci held onto was slipping through her hands. Overtime, she found that by [...]

Relationships are a two way street, but you can’t make your partner or spouse recover with you. Sometimes when we’re in the midst of a healing journey, we outgrow the people we love. While you may still be head-over-heels in love with the person, you’ve started to notice that you want different things in life, or that you’re going in two separate directions. Maybe you want more, and your spouse or partner is content where they are. There’s nothing wrong with wanting different things, however, this could be a telltale sign that you’re outgrowing your spouse or partner in recovery. Outgrowing Your Spouse or Partner in Recovery In [...]